Just 4-6 weeks shy of Layla’s third birthday we could confidently say that we were 95% potty trained! If you don’t want to read our entire journey below, take these two pieces of advice with you:

1. Know when to push forward, but also don’t be afraid to back off if there are sign that they’re not feeling ready (it’ll save you both some heartache)
2. Get out of your own way! I was my own biggest road block to potty training, and if you find yourself over thinking like I was, just dive in and know there are many methods to get to your potty training destination

Our potty training journey probably started 4-6 weeks before Layla’s SECOND birthday, so we have a lot of ground to cover. The babies are with me all day, so while I’m not just strutting around the house naked, they see me changing clothes, hop into the shower with me and follow me into the bathroom – this gives us a lot of opportunities to start talking about bodies early and often. When the big interest in the bathroom set in it went from “I’m following you to the bathroom because we do everything together” to “hey, what are you doing when we come in here?” When I tell you there was zero personal space…she wanted to see what was going in the potty as it was going in the potty. And she had lots of questions:

“Mama are you tinkling?”

“Mama what are those?” “Panties! When you start using the potty you stop wearing diapers and will wear big girl panties too!”

“Mama are you POOPING?”

“Mama what is that?” “It’s toilet paper to clean up your body after using the potty”

“Mama, why are you bleeding?” (so, yes, there has already been some age appropriate period talk)

Shortly after her second birthday we purchased a mini potty training toilet and Layla thought it was so cool! We were equally excited about her excitement around the potty as she pushed the flush button, hid a “surprise” in the bowl, and even pretended to sit on it a time or two. But it was game over as soon as she (and we) realized that she could pick up the potty and carry it around. We were NOT about to have that happen with a full bowl! So within 24 hours it went from potty training potential to a mess waiting to happen. After that we let the potty curiosity go on for a bit without much further action. I was late in my pregnancy with baby Sophia and didn’t want to start potty training and bring home a new baby at the same time. One major life change at a time, please!

For the next 4-5 months, we continued to fuel her interest – having her come to the potty with us, answering all of her potty questions, and even helping her sit on the potty a time or two. Around this time we also made two more changes: we switched to pull ups and also had to decide what kind of modifications we wanted to add to our potty to make it child friendly! We ultimately decided on a small toilet seat-step ladder combo in Layla’s bathroom. Some of our friends have also installed the toilet lid with a built in kid seat and have absolutely loved it. On our main level toilet, we added a basic step stool since this is a toilet that is more often shared with us and other guests.

By the time Layla hit 2.5 years, things seems to be really cruising along! She was so excited about her “bear” potty/step stool and was using the potty at least a couple times a day. But the novelty wore off quickly and she would still go to the potty when she got there, but getting her to sit on the potty felt like a battle. There are so many different methods forward here – using a reward like stickers, M&Ms, toys, etc. or taking the hard road with a “we can’t do XYZ until we potty.” I really didn’t want to start using candy and food as a motivator, but I also wasn’t ready to hold the boundary of “we can’t leave the house until we try.” I knew that the next best option would be to rip the bandaid (or the Pull Up) off and go for it.

I was definitely nervous so I bought myself some time by making a big show of it: “Layla! We’re on our last box of Pull Ups! When it’s gone, we’re going to start using Big Girl Underwear!” And then the box was gone! …And I was about to need to be away 8 hours a day for a week to coach Camp GOTR and talked myself out of it. Luckily while I was coaching I had Grammy and Mamaw help with the girls, but I still felt guilty just throwing a pack of toddler undies at them and wishing them luck. There had also been a *Potty Train in 3 Days* book floating around my mom group that I now was holding and I admittedly had hardly cracked open. Once my week of being Camp Counselor Katie was complete, I finally just turned my brain off and we both put on our Big Girl Panties!

Although there was a learning curve, I can honestly say we haven’t had a single full-on daytime accident. I made sure to have a stack of clean princess panties on hand because there were a lot of instances (and still are once in a while) where she will start to tinkle then immediately stop herself and let me know that it is potty time. We got lucky in potty training for poops that Layla didn’t like to poop in a diaper – I suspect because there wasn’t enough room in a diaper for her to comfortably push out something solid – so she was eager to poop on the potty. This may be a different story for those who poop more frequently and/or less solidly; a fear of pooping on the potty seems very common for toddlers for a variety of reasons, but as long as we continue to talk through it and encourage, we all get there eventually!

At night time we focused on trying to potty right before bed and kept a water proof cover on her mattress. We don’t limit any fluids before bed if she’s thirsty, and just take a mental note if it seems like she drank a lot in the evening to prepare for a potential night time wakeup. Although she can open her door and walk to her bear potty, typically if she does wake up needing to potty, she’ll cry out for one of us to come help her. We’ve had a handful of nighttime accidents but generally she does really well overnight. Before potty training she was waking up from nighttime and naps with a dry diaper more often than not! We keep extra clean sheets on hand so if there is an accident we can simply remove sheets, clean the waterproof cover and put fresh on while she tries to potty and we clean her up. It is heartbreaking how upset she feels if there is an accident!

Now that we’re safely in the “potty trained” zone, we still offer tons of encouragement and cheering when she goes to the bathroom, and ask frequently if she needs to use the potty. She practices wiping herself and we have lots of high level conversations about how to keep ourselves clean and dry! the 3 day potty training method talks about staying home for an extended time to get comfortable potty training, but we would go stir-crazy, so it was another instance where we dove right in and got lucky that things worked out well. I try and keep in mind driving distances and the bathroom situation at our destinations. On longer trips she has even let us know when she needed to go and was able to hold on for us to find a nearby bathroom! I keep extra clothes, panties and cleanup supplies in the car should we ever need them.

I know there are sure to be additional bumps to navigate, but I am beyond proud of how smoothly Layla has leapt into this next Big Girl milestone!