The week leading up to Christmas this year has had me in an absolute emotional chokehold. Between cold germs staggering their way between all three babies that made it seem to stay forever, to a major restructuring in my job that hit the week of Thanksgiving, all encased with the ever-impossible motherhood desires to pour 200% into my family, I’m one really good *happy tear* moment from the floodgates opening up uncontrollably.

In a passing moment a few days before Christmas Eve I think my husband truly hit the nail on the head: when you’re a kid the buildup to Christmas is so exciting and you just can’t wait for it to (FINALLY!) get here. But as an adult it’s almost a little sad because after all of the decorating and activities and special holiday-esque stuff, the day comes and then it all just…ends? 2024 is the year we ditched “Christmas begins the day after Thanksgiving” and fully embraced that “on November 1st Halloween goes down and the tree comes out” because with young kids the season just felt too fast. Now that it’s over are we going to be the people who also leave their decor up well into the new year to continue to try and feel something?

There were so many great moments this holiday season that I need to really hold onto – which is funny because several of them weren’t even exclusive to the holiday and can (and should!) happen again anytime. But with such a struggle to mentally find my feet again in my professional life it was hard to actually really take those moments in without my mind wandering to the next task or thing that had to get done so I could enjoy the next moment. As many can relate, the holiday season also tests the complexities and fragility of relationships with extended family and friends, so add that to your mix of trying to navigate it all!

There were so many cookies I wanted to bake and deliver together, family-Christmas movie nights I wanted to have and other fun little things to do with my babies that I feel like I never quite got to – although I know they felt an outpouring of magic (and hopefully none of my frazzled-ness)! Luckily, our Christmas Day was everything I needed to reset from the immense build up. We had a quiet morning, took our time opening presents, had a special breakfast and really just soaked it in! Getting to just *be* in this unstructured time was so wonderful; I was able to actually turn my brain off from just jumping to the next item on the checklist or “well if I don’t do this now my day tomorrow will be too much.” My hope is to bottle some of that up and bring it with me into 2026!

So, while there is still a little bit of that sad “Christmas is over?” feeling, there’s also this kindof relief that I’ll have a little more time and brain space open up for that intentional family time that previously belonged to “why aren’t you up and creating more Christmas magic?” My final note to self is admittedly a conflicting one going into 2026: keep striving toward that motherhood greatness, and make it what YOU want it to be, but also don’t forget to slow down, step back, and enjoy all of the amazing work you’re doing and have already done!